stacehillblog

My Thoughts and Ideas

News Flash 12.11.14 Introduction

 My Name is Stacy Hill and I live in the beautiful Okanagan Valley in Supernatural British Columbia, Canada.  One of the safest, nicest places to live on earth!

Since February of 2010 I have had to opportunity to spend an inordinate amount of time by myself as I travelled  around North America.  This free time gave me the opportunity to do some research on topics that are timely; connect many dots on issues that impact our lives.  I now have the time to put pen to paper, so to speak, and express my thoughts.

I have followed, with compelling interest all my life Politics, local, national and international: Economics both micro and macro: The Environment and how the earth is coping with mankind or man is treating the earth (not well) : Religion (which is different than a relationship with Jesus) and its control on its followers, plus how limiting and counter productive it is to spiritual things. BUT God really and truly does have it (all of the above) under control . 

These topics Politics, Economics, Environment and Religion interestingly form the acronym PEER.  By learning truth about PEER hopefully it will allow us, you, me and others to prepare for what may lie ahead! 

I have followed closely world events from the recent US election to the Arab Spring, the pending break-up of the EU and the pending US financial Armageddon, and many other events that are going to shape our future, whether we like it or not! 

Make no mistake about it our world as we know it is about to change dramatically.  Some of these changes will be incredibly difficult; some changes may result in the wholesale taking of lives.  On the surface it is a rather ugly and even frightening.    

There is an old Chinese symbol that is one small symbol surrounded by another.  The outside symbol indicates danger and change, the inner symbol indicates new opportunity.   

I recently read an article in Maclean’s 3rd annual “RETHINK issue, 12.10.22.  There was an interesting interview with Brian David Johnson.  Who pray tell is that?  His job is to think….Nice job if you can get it… but think into the future.  He seems to be pretty good at it, as his title is “Chief Futurist at Intel[1]”.  For those of you who don’t know what Intel is, Check this out!  

Brian David Johnson made a very interesting comment in this interview.  He was asked, “Do you like our current dystopian[2] attitude toward the Future?”  This was a part of his response, “You can’t let the future happen to you; you can’t sit back and be passive.  We all, as human beings, personally build the future, whether it be our own, our family’s, the world’s.  We have to own that fact and we need to do something about that!”

I now have a little free time (for how long I don’t know), I have decided to share my thoughts about what I have learned and figured out with some degree of accuracy, (I believe)  Hopefully it will help you effective build your future[3].  I might also help someone, possibly you, understand how interwoven all of the above is…how it will impact your life, how to prepare for these inevitable changes (I don’t know where that will go) but one thing is for certain; “The more information you have, the better off you may be… may be as I have no idea as to the end game other than “GOD WINS”. 

I will try to post a couple of issues each week.  These issues will be not much longer than this edition.I hope you enjoy my meandering and musings!  Please feel free to comment and or start a discussion on the blog. Please forgive any errors in grammer, spelling and/or context…when you write something then profit it on you own it is really easy to miss someting!

[1]  Brian David Johnson is really, really smart. It is his job to guide Intel (technology) into the future to create products that will make our lives easier and more productive.  He looks out 10 – 15 years.

[2]Dystopian is the opposite of Utopia.  Click here 

[3] Brian David Johnson, Earlier in the article he was asked “What do you see 10 years ahead?”  “Learn How to Code!”  

Introduction
1st Edition 
1st Issue

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How to be a Great Parent!

How to Be a Great Parent!

The Bible says, “Spare the rod and spoil the child!”  It also says, “Teach[1] them the way to go and they will follow!”

 But the question is, “How much rod and how much teach?”  This is not an easy answer but it is certain that if there is not “Rod”[2] used appropriately at an early age, no amount of teaching will get them to follow!”

These are bold and brash statements and I will attempt to explain my position with a real life story I was told by a parent. 

These parents have found the correct balance…but it didn’t just happen…they worked at parenting as a cohesive team! 

I have known this family for about 15 years.  Their children are now in their mid teens, with the oldest just having completed grade 11.  Both of their children are on the Honor Roll in school.  They are good athletes enjoying sports and are extraordinarily talented musicians.  Some would call them gifted and they may very well be so…but more importantly they have parents that are fully engaged.  

There oldest child is truly gifted in music, with a perfect pitch in her ear and voice.  Over the past 3 – 4 years she was encouraged to move toward the production side of music as she showed a real passion for this side of the music industry.  Her parents encouraged her with a music production career…that is until recently.  They had an epiphany and totally change direction in their opinion about a career in the music industry!    

Her Father and I were out for a walk, spoiling it by chasing a white ball.  He told me that they had suggested a career for their oldest daughter and explained to her that he would not support her in pursuing a university degree in music because the financial investment will not guarantee a financially successful career for her.   I was dumbfounded.  They recommended that their daughter should become a Pharmacist.  Imagine telling your teenager that he or she was not going to go to school to become what she was passionate about?  Unheard of…Parent abuse?  Not on your life.  Good parenting…ABSOULETLY!   Her parents know the value of, “Teach them the way they should go!”  

I was shocked!  In this day and age of live and let live, telling your teenager what career path you have chosen for them is virtually unheard of in our culture!  I needed to know the who, what, why and outcome of imposing their will on their daughter!    

Their father, who is much younger than me, and apparently much wiser, took the time to explain their decision to me, and it made a lot of sense.  

He told me there are two types of careers.  One style of a career fulfills a “Want” and the other fulfills a “Need.”  A “Want” career path relates to fulfilling your wants, such as becoming an artist, a poet, an athlete, a philosopher, a jeweler, interior designer.  These occupations fall into the want based careers. 

A “Need” career is a path that society needs to operate within.  These careers are in demand by society.  All areas of the Medical Field including all support staff such as Pharmacists, Physiotherapy, Clinical Technicians for X-ray, Ultra Sound, etc, labor style careers such as Truck Drivers particularly for the transportation of food products, Plumbers, Electricians.  Another NEED style of career will be in the care of the elderly…this is the fastest growing area in all sectors!  There is always a demand for “Need” based careers.

This all made incredible sense to me but the question remained, “How did you tell your daughter it was wiser to become a Pharmacist after encouraging her to become a Music Producer?”  After all, what can most of us tell a teenager?

“Well”, my friend said, “we have a very good relationship with trust and communication with our kids.  Together, my wife, daughter and I talked through the realities of our economy; different industries and “Need” verses “Want” based careers.  We painted a pretty good picture of how her being in a “Need” based career would give her financial freedom.  This would provide the opportunity to pursuit her passions, give her the flexibility and time to raise her own children, should that occur.  It’s also a portable career; Pharmacists are in demand around the world!”

Dumbfounded, I asked, “Was it just that simple?”  Which my friend had a good laugh about!

“No”, he said, “Actually it wasn’t that simple at all!  After a few tears on my daughters part, and then an explanation using a rational argument, she understood that this was a good career choice!  She also understood that we loved her and wanted the very best for her!  Once she got that … the rest was fairly simple!”

“So how did you make the choice to being a Pharmacist?” I asked.

“That too was easy”, he responded, “She loves math and the sciences, excelling in both particularly Chemistry, but she is very squeamish when it comes to blood and the medical profession.  Therefore becoming a Pharmacist was a simple decision.  It pays very well, no blood, significantly less hours per week than a doctor or nurse, no “On – Call” duties or shift work.  A Pharmacist can work part-time and is a perfect career for raising a family should she chose to do so.  A Pharmacist income will provide the funds and time to pursue her passion, music, in whatever direction that may take her!  It took her a little time to process this path we chose for her but she has come around and is looking forward to becoming a Pharmacist!”

So after all this information as to how the parents were able to guide their daughter, I reflected upon how they were able to make such a life defining decision for their children and have the children accept that decision.

These parents are just that!  Parents! They have actively participated in their kids lives and they did so from day one.  They do not and have never molly coddled their children.  The kids are not “Bubble Wrapped” in any respect.  The parents have encouraged independence giving the kids a long rope to explore and expand their lives but there was an end to the length of the rope.  The kids knew where the boundary was and if they ventured out too far appropriate action was taken.  This was often done thru a discussion asking the kid(s), as they got a little older, what they thought the consequences for their inappropriate behavior should be!

These parents have expectations of their children! Oh, how novel in this day and age! Expectations teach children responsibility and are fundamental foundational building blocks of creating self esteem in a child.

It is time to stop making and find excuses for our children. “Oh, my Johnnie or Suzie wouldn’t do that!  She (or He) would never tell their teacher to F-off!”  Parents, get a grip!  Most of you don’t have a clue what your kids are doing or thinking!  How involved in their life are you?

Here are a few litmus test questions for you?

  1. Do your kids (teenagers) like hanging with you?
  2. Do you like and enjoy hanging with your kids?
  3. What do you do with them that THEY enjoy?

If you answered “Yes” to all of the above, Good for you!

If you answered “Yes” to one of the above…that is a good start!

If you answered “No” to one of the above…I would encourage you to start to work on building the right relationship with your kids.  It is up to you…not them!

If you answered “No” to all of the above…get some help for you and your family as soon as you can!  It will not be your kids that are going to repair the relationship…it will has to come from you.  After all you are the PARENT!

So many parents seem to want to be friends with their kids!  Often they provide a long rope with no tether at the end.  No boundaries!  Kids need those boundaries because it provides guidelines to help define them and create a foundational structure of right/wrong, integrity, responsibility and respect for themselves.

More often than not kids lose respect of the parents pushing the parents away, increasing the distance of friendship when the boundaries are most needed! 

Yes, my friend who told me this story did pay a price of putting the kids first, they were not able to continue at random their former lifestyle but they adapted their lives, integrating their children into their lives!  As such, for a few brief years, of guiding their kids, the kids have the utmost respect and admiration love and affection for their parents and dare I say the parents and kids are now the “Best of Friends”!

[1] Teach also means to Guide

[2]  These children have not seen the working end of the rod more than 3 times in their lives

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